Reply on A.S.: “Overthinking”

Hi, you,

Okay, firstly, that’s a lesson to learn — never reveal too much info about yourself to ANYONE (not even family) — don’t get very comfortable with anyone, they become a liability in the future. I’ve made the mistake in the past, and have truly regretted it.

Especially never, ever say things that can be used against you on WhatsApp, or IG — in-person is still fine, but over texts, BIG NO.

Moreover, when you choose a “confidante” of sorts, always assess the person’s intentions — what they require from you presently & perhaps in the future (especially true when dealing with the opposite gender) + what their emotional stability is like (mad-man theory)

Coming to preventing overthinking:

• Overthinking is important to an extent, I suggest ideating about various fall-out plans to prepare internally — different scenarios & what your potential response to those may be (think her leaking SS, or whatever) — this will help soothe the blow if the worst-case scenario were to ever come true

• I suggest laying her down slowly — just like you can detect when a movie is about to come to an end, I suggest bringing the friendship to an end over the course of the upcoming months — help her find another person whom she can be clingy towards, preferably not a boyfriend, as that will open a new can of worms — a new bsf who can hang-out with her IRL

Though I’m yet to find a solution to get rid of overthinking entirely, or limit it in my life, so I don’t have much advice for you, but what I can say is, try to bring the friendship to an end — it’s not worth getting your mind-fucked with + clingy people are very volatile, you never know what extent a person can go to for your attention (speaking from first-hand experience)

But hey, look at the bright side — you learnt a very, very important lesson at a very young age. People are unpredictable, and it’s always best to limit the ammunition you provide to someone about yourself.